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broken_doll87

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[
Wed, Jun 03, 2009
]

The general idea here is to bold the items on this list you have actually done.

01. Bought everyone in the bar a drink

02. Swam with wild dolphins

03. Climbed a mountain

04. Taken a Ferrari for a test drive

05. Been inside the Great Pyramid

06. Held a tarantula

07. Taken a candlelit bath with someone

08. Said “I love you” and meant it

09. Hugged a tree

10. Bungee jumped

11. Visited Paris

12. Watched a lightning storm at sea

13. Stayed up all night long and saw the sun rise

14. Seen the Northern Lights

15. Gone to a huge sports game

16. Walked the stairs to the top of the leaning Tower of Pisa

17. Grown and eaten your own vegetables – ( some, not many though. Mainly lettus)

18. Touched an iceberg

19. Slept under the stars

20. Changed a baby’s diaper

21. Taken a trip in a hot air balloon

22. Watched a meteor shower

23. Gotten drunk on champagne

24. Given more than you can afford to charity

25. Looked up at the night sky through a telescope

26. Had an uncontrollable giggling fit at the worst possible moment

27. Had a food fight

28. Bet on a winning horse

29. Asked out a stranger

30. Had a snowball fight

31. Screamed as loudly as you possibly can

32. Held a lamb (No, but have held baby goats)

33. Seen a total eclipse (looner eclipse)

34. Ridden a roller coaster

35. Hit a home run

36. Danced like a fool and not cared who was looking – (i have been dancing drunk before)

37. Adopted an accent for an entire day

38. Actually felt happy about your life, even for just a moment – even when in pain, i have a great family, and the love of my life by my side.

39. Had two hard drives for your computer

40. Visited all 50 states

41. Taken care of someone who was drunk – (Jackie the most, but also Scott, and even kyle pucking.)

42. Had amazing friends – who hasent, i had amazing ones growing up, after i moved to kleignburg, and still now and hope to make even more after the next move

43. Danced with a stranger in a foreign country – YES,  in germany at some club, that was fun haha.

44. Watched wild whales – off of Victoria Island, though i was little i do rember

45. Stolen a sign

46. Backpacked in Europe

47. Taken a road trip

48. Gone rock climbing – Miss that, learned how to use the ropes at 12

49. Midnight walk on the beach – (goal for this weekend)

50. Gone sky diving

51. Visited Ireland

52. Been heartbroken longer than you were actually in love

53. In a restaurant, sat at a stranger’s table and had a meal with them

54. Visited Japan

55. Milked a cow

56. Alphabetized your CDs

57. Pretended to be a superhero - (i was a 3-4year old, with a huge towel, it was my cape)

58. Sang karaoke

59. Lounged around in bed all day - (have i am sure out of enjoyment in life, but now do on the couch simply because it hurts to much to move.)

60. Played touch football

61. Gone scuba diving (Snorkled over shipwrecks?)

62. Kissed in the rain

63. Played in the mud

64. Played in the rain

65. Gone to a drive-in theater

66. Visited the Great Wall of China

67. Started a business

68. Fallen in love and not had your heart broken

69. Toured ancient sites

70. Taken a martial arts class

71. Played D&D for more than 6 hours straight

72. Gotten married

73. Been in a movie

74. Crashed a party

75. Gotten divorced

76. Gone without food for 5 days

77. Made cookies from scratch

78. Won first prize in a costume contest

79. Ridden a gondola in Venice

80. Gotten a tattoo

81. Rafted the Snake River

82. Been on television news programs as an “expert”

83. Got flowers for no reason

84. Performed on stage

85. Been to Las Vegas

86. Recorded music

87. Eaten shark

88. Kissed on the first date

89. Gone to Thailand

90. Bought a house (well, yes and no... i am in on it but)

91. Been in a combat zone

92. Buried one/both of your parents

93. Been on a cruise ship

94. Spoken more than one language fluently

95. Performed in Rocky Horror

96. Raised children/currently raising child

97. Followed your favorite band/singer on tour

99. Taken an exotic bicycle tour in a foreign country

100. Picked up and moved to another city to just start over

101. Walked the Golden Gate Bridge

102. Sang loudly in the car, and didn’t stop when you knew someone was looking

103. Had plastic surgery

104. Survived an accident that you shouldn’t have survived

105. Wrote articles for a large publication

106. Lost 100 pounds

107. Held someone while they were having a flashback

108. Piloted an airplane

109. Touched a stingray

110. Broken someone’s heart

111. Helped an animal give birth

112. Won money on a T.V. game show

113. Broken a bone

114. Gone on an African photo safari

115. Had something  pierced other than your ears

116. Fired a rifle, shotgun, or pistol

117. Eaten mushrooms that were gathered in the wild

118. Ridden a horse

119. Had major surgery

120. Had a snake as a pet

121. Hiked to the bottom of the Grand Canyon

122. Slept for more than 30 hours over the course of 48 hours

123. Visited more foreign countries than U.S. states

124. Visited all 7 continents

125. Taken a canoe trip that lasted more than 2 days

126. Eaten kangaroo meat

127. Eaten sushi

128. Had your picture in the newspaper

129. Changed someone’s mind about something you care deeply about.

130. Gone back to school – (after highschool i took a year off, then went back if that counts... even though i had to quit again)

131. Parasailed

132. Touched a cockroach

133. Eaten fried green tomatoes

134. Read The Iliad - and the Odyssey

135. Selected one “important” author who you missed in school, and read

136. Killed and prepared an animal for eating - (if fish count)
137. Skipped all your school reunions

138. Communicated with someone without sharing a common spoken language

139. Been elected to public office

140. Written your own computer language

141. Thought to yourself that you’re living your dream

142. Had to put someone you love into hospice care

143. Built your own PC from parts

144. Sold your own artwork to someone who didn’t know you (should have, but for some reason said no)

145. Had a booth at a street fair

146. Dyed your hair - (so many un-natural colours)

147. Been a DJ

148. Shaved your head

149. Caused a car accident

150. Saved someone’s life

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[
Thu, May 21, 2009
]
[ mood | moody ]


On June 28th Me and Scott move.
The house sold this year, and we found a house that is well within buget,
We had been hunting for a "final" home.

Even found a place that would work well as a final home, in Rockwood.
we put an offer on it but it was dependant on selling our home, we did not before they had another offer
2 offers in fact, a bidding way and ended up getting 13000 more then we could posibly offer since we were already stretched.
Rockwood however is a very small town, quaint but for someone rather imobile like me rather unreachable since no busses and now place to shop or do erronds.

When we had it set in our mind, after much looking after loosing rockwood place, we reolized we
could not find a final home in our price range, without requireing another 40000 of needed work.
at that point we found a place in Fergus, not a chance it could be our final home.

but it has the needed 2car garage, a decent backyard (for a new development, its HUGE), a great sized tv room, a room that will work great for Scotts pool table.  the bedrooms are SMALL. but thet will work for me and scott, and the computer/sewing room. its nice.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

we sold the apliences with the guelph place, and the fergus owners wanted their stove, and lacked a dishwasher, and the fridge is white so we wanted to upgrade.
 

So. i bought, a dishwasher, smooth top stove, and also a fridge (we plan on selling the old one or using it in bacement)
I will have money into this house so it will be more so my home, we already drew up a contract so if things turn sour at any time within 2 years of moving in, i get my money back out of the place. SO thats good we have that in place for both of us.

will perhaps post pics of appliences later, if i get to take some when i am paying for more of the appliences next time i stop by "bad boy"

i have made, "change of address" anouncements, and am now making sure i have my address book up to date as i fill out the post cards to send out for me and scott.

 

Soon i have to "give knowtice" on my apartment in toronto that i have been subleting.

soon to is going to the cottage with scott for his birthday, i dont have anything for him yet.

he got laid off for 2months (ends a week after we move) so its not like i can simply just slip away to shop


and pain managment issues make life rather tricky as it stands.
right now i am at the point the pain doc almost seems to have given up.
but will know more next time i see him on tuesday, untill then in much pain, tryting to do this to take mind off it.
getting off demerol, its hard, since i am always in pain and lots so having the meds makes it tricky not to take them. and getting off them means LOVEKY headaches.

| speak | +mem | edit |

[
Wed, Jan 21, 2009
]

shelley, feels like crap!

and i have to walk down the road to my 2nd day of first aid/cpr.
so i cant take anything, or curl up (both i would like to)

i am bringing my heat pad (rice heat pad) and gona use it today. fuck it.

i dont even have any of the back thurmicare ones i could use (that ould last all day, and could even hide)

i have neck ones i was given, and wow are they useless.

........

i am 22 today.
| speak | +mem | edit |

[
Sun, Nov 09, 2008
]

i need to think of a way to make some income, some hounest income that i am capable, even with how often i have times i cant do anything at all. Perhaps the cards will really kick off, doubtfull but who knows. though i feel like a moron, christmas is comming fast, and i forgot them all at scotts, so could have been working on listing them, and making them friday-tuesday and then tuesday onwards. but right now i cant do anything till tuesday when i get back to guelph (hopefully)
 

 

I have to figure out a good room and board amount so i am not causing any extra strain or stress on scott.

i have to do the dishes every day,

cook at least a few times a week. bake weekly.

do the laundry, keep up with house cleaning. a

and not let my things become messy around the house.

i have to stop being a downer and depressing everyone around me. i know i wouldnt want to be around me the way i am. but on one hand its getting hard very hard to denny pain anymore since its so always nagging at me, and some people say they want me to be hounest about the pain. but then i know its tireing to hear about it on and on.

i need to look into booking a hotel day before and afture surgery, near the hospital.

find out the pricing of the truck my mom set up to rent, that i am paying for... but she aparently booked without even considering cost let alone comparing and finding a cheaper one. grrr. she loves helping me blow my money. i do that to her as well, but still.

i need to start drinking juice using the juicer
eating more veggies, flax seeds and such.

hopefully loosesome weight befor surgery.

need to get the hydro sheet from land lady, so i can get tash to fill it out so she pays for her hydro instead of me.

should sign up for linda.com and study that for at least 7hours a week.

 

my pain is becoming something thats makeing me this bitter and always sad person, fatter too. i am so self concius now, and its no fair to scott. that man is so incredibal with me, but i always worry one day i will be just to much.

 

i hope surgery works and i can get a job in january.

i should start tracking exactly when i ovulate also, since i aparently have no idea anymore or even if my body has a patern

 

GAH

| speak | +mem | edit |

[
Tue, Nov 04, 2008
]
shelley wonders what her life could be like, if she didnt have the pain

if the surgery acturaly works this time.. or anything works
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RIP EVE - Pet mouse [
Thu, Oct 30, 2008
]
[ mood | depressed ]


R.I.P.    Eve.

You were a cute pet mouse,
Though you always seemed weeker from the first day
I only had you for less then a month.

You died, from a respitory viral infection best i understand (looking things up)

This morning, when i got back up from bed cause i couldnt sleep, i went over to look at you and Eden. You were not moving though, and breathing heavy, i held you for a while, checked to see if Eden would coudle with you like she had been doing off and on all day (while you were still fine)
She wouldnt, so i set you up on a towel with tod and water in a clear basket by my bed.

Each time i checked on you, you were the same. Untill the last time i checked you had rolled to your side and were dead :( that was less then4 hours later

 

once i started googling things, everything said you were very likely going to die, and that i should seperate the mice. this is not a good start to my day, or more so even the endo to a bad day (only got to bed at 5:30am or later)

for the record. this sucks. what to i do with a dead mouse?
i normaly burry pets... im in an apartment, and not going to scotts till saterday.

and in other news, i feel like im about to puke (unrelated to mouse) and am in pain.
... i should check on eden, shes not moving much but lets home shes only asleep

i havwe to call the disablity ppl, and talk. i need to talk with them BADLY. im so fucked.
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changing [
Mon, Dec 03, 2007
]
[ mood | sick ]

 this year, so much change, and so much still likely to come.
my grat grandmother, who i did talk to and thought very wise. died in the summer. rather suddenly
sure she was old, but since parents kept things from me, it was sudden, i only knew she was going downhill 6days before her death.

my grandma isn't fairing to well right now. i hope he will be able to enjoy one last christmas at home, and get to see my parents and me and also scott, he seems to like scott. and his thoughts there although would not make up my mind about things are important to me. more than my fathers i think. its sad though, it looks very much like he will never see me graduate, never see me on my wedding day if i have one, if (IF) i ever had a child would miss that to. he seems to see though as if getting a better view then i myself or anyone elce can about what is doing good vs bad in my life. this is why its important to me.

i hope he's still okay by christmas.

my parents are being dumb and keeping things from me again. they seem to think it helps the situation. each time i point out and we have huge argument about it when surprize someone dies.. and oh they knew/saw it comming but left me without knowing anything. at this rate by the time they learn there will be no one that could posibly start dieing left

i'm sick, and the docs arn't sure what with, i should have results back tuesday. results about ankle then too.
likely just strept throte thats more  drug tolerent then it should be, 
and likely nothing wrong on x-rays with ankle just a sprang thats still hurting.

there is a cat named stewie sitting in my lap as i type. i love this cat, and thankfully it turnes out i not overly alergic to cats:)

| 1 | speak | +mem | edit |

[
Tue, Sep 18, 2007
]
Today in computer class i have to pay attention. well once she's don taking attendence that is.

My Core classes, the ones that in reality make up the program i paid to be here for, have so far  been good. They take attendance in the main ones.

i love tech classes... we just did a mini assignment thinger to see if we read our notes, and we were to put it in the teachers drop box, but as techknology is... its not working. so at the end of class she's going to pass around her flash drive and have everyone save to it one by one... thats not a pain for everyone.

ah wells.

now we're about to learn to trace.. on a mac, in illustrator.

i'm decently paying attention in class so i'll end this here.

i have alot i have to do tonight. gah.
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[
Fri, Sep 14, 2007
]
CTV shows because thats all i get, until everything goes digital, then i get none. but thats another issue.
posibly CH, though i haven't tryed


returning dates
Sept. 19 Wednesdays, 9 p.m.Gossip Girl
Sept. 23 Sundays, 8 p.m Cold Case 
Sept. 24 Mondays, 10 p.m CSI: Miami
Sept. 25Tuesdays, 10 p.m Law & Order: SVU
Sept. 26Wednesdays, 9 p.m Criminal Minds
Sept. 26 Wednesdays, 10pm CSI: NY
Sept. 27 Thursdays, 7 p.m ER

Sept. 27 Thursday, 9pm Grey’s Anatomy
Sept. 27 Thursday, 10pm CSI
Sept. 28 Fridays, 8 p.m Ghost Whisperer
Sept. 28 Friday, 10pm Without a Trace
Sept. 30 Sundays, 9 p.m Desperate Housewives


Oct. 7 Sundays, 7 p.m Law & Order: Criminal Intent

| 1 | speak | +mem | edit |

[
Sun, Aug 26, 2007
]
i've had my first sleep in res
my first shower, need a new curtain baddly.
and in not so many minutes the floor meeting to go to.

my ikea bulb blew up, inside.. so my room in theory has meurcery in it.. isn't that nice.
5.99lamp
7.99 bulb that i turned it on, and it flashed and then stoped working, i looked closer to see it had blown up. no receite but hope to take it back and be all wtf
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for my orginization is all. [
Tue, Aug 21, 2007
]
[ mood | gloomy ]

Aug 25 sat8ammove into res at humber lakeshore.
Aug26 sun  
Aug 27 mon   
Aug 28 tues9:30am
10:45am
12:00
package and graphic design orientation starts at "F205"
move to assembly hall
move to quad east L building
   
   
   
   
   
   
| 2 | speak | +mem | edit |

[
Fri, Aug 10, 2007
]
[ mood | sad ]

its hard to beleive 2 years have now already passed.
i wonder what things would be different and what woiuld be the same if you were still around.
would we all still talk, what things would you be doing.

so hard to beleive 2 years ago, you were done high school.
things were just on the way to starting i guess.

still miss you,
R.I.P.
Shane ... :(

| 1 | speak | +mem | edit |

[
Sun, Jun 24, 2007
]
will eventuraly compleate the last post. can't now though.
back from the show tonight at Rilyes, was good. was awsome to see spin and mase's band play finaly.
i'm still a bit drunk.
tomorrow is pride, in less then 12 hours we will be down town again with the homo's

omg, tonight i saw zanta.. haha lol
silly zanta.
i saw zanta while across from zanzabar haha.
tonights the first time i sleep in my own me only personal bed in over a month, thats weird.

i think i'm going to hunt through the kitchen next haha.

today my emotional drained feeling was starting to hit in the morning, horibly.
i have since set it aside and will perhaps consider it after pride.
but fuck it screws me over, i want nothing more than to dissapear when it gets to me.

i'm starting to get scared for school, for far to many reasons.
| 3 | speak | +mem | edit |

[
Sat, Jun 23, 2007
]
i going back to beg again,
perhaps some cerial, but fuck this.
i just feel so drained
emotionaly and physicaly.
gah.
| 1 | speak | +mem | edit |

for a week from hell, i don't feel it yet. [
Fri, Jun 22, 2007
]
[ mood | numb ]

to hounest for public, but fuck-it

~friday night, slept. i think
~saterday got up early, parents stopped by. cleaned a bunch, did laundry and such.
then family dinner at scott's with out scott for a while cause he had to work late.
started hurting a bit but just had a couple drinks. stayed up late i think.. i can't recall. something
~ sunday got up at 6am stayed up, started feeling like shit. compleate shit. took my best painkillers at time. reolized i didn't have enough if the pain lasted for more then a day and a bit, then after taking half of one, lost the bottle (half the pills where in table draw also) took full dose and pain still kept increacing. took gravol before taking pills knowing there was a chance that pain could make me be sick, and waist a pill if they were not fully working fast enough. they were working fully, but pain to much so by 11 i had nothing in me. parents were in town (with out me knowing) and i had called them to see if they could get the pharmasist to forward my demeral perscription to a pharmacy here. the moment my mom called i had just finished upchucking everything and couldn't take the pain. i mentiond i was going to ask scott to take me to the hospital when he got home, they mentiond they weren't that far away and came. at this point was unable to walk. they showed up, and shortly so did scott, later then i was hopeing for while in so much pain. my theory was he could bring me to hospital and they would take care of me, and he could acturaly get some sleep seeing as i knew he had to work again that night. (7am-12pm, then 10:45- 9am) so parents ended up taking me. got injected with random shit. it worked a little. got a re-fill try perscription pluss something elce. came back home and slept (couldn't go to work for my sunday night shift)  tryed to be up during the night to get back on scedual. slept off and on while feeling like shit.
~monday waited for the hospital call to tell me to come in for ultrasoundsw that they said i had to do the next day, eventuraly got there and got them done, had to wait in emerge to get the results, while there started feeling like ass again (had alredy taken perscriptions at this point to cope) finaly got in and was told the ultra sounds looked normal (yeah, they always do... my thing is rarly ever seein in any  cases on ultrasounds) after the doc told me to just take my original perscription more frequently (him thinking that would help, i pointed out it was at its strongest point right then yet i was in tears in this stupid room) ended up with another perscription. got my way partly home with bus's when i gave up after getting new perscription filled and woke scott up to get me. (once again couldn't work that night, on new perscription) (more details about it, but to tired to get into)
~tuesday get a call checking i can be into work that night, i'm feeling better so i say yes. we get grosheries. i get back home to see dad called. soo my grandmother has just died. and now my dads grilling me on when/how ext will i get to the funeral that he seems to know nothing about. i not even sure i can get out of work now cause i fucked up so bad earlyer that week. go to work, feel half like shit there, oh well. tell the superviser that i have to miss the next night so i can sleep so i can make it to a funeral....

will continue later, MUST sleep NOW.

this week blows, will more when it all hits me.

| 2 | speak | +mem | edit |

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